6 Reasons to Avoid the Mullet Skirt

The Mullet Skirt started to silently creep into fashion last summer, but this weekend Manhattan officially turned into Mullet-topia.

Maybe it’s because it was the opening of Rock of Ages, but I’m here to tell you — with love — that this look isn’t flattering.  Now, a touch of asymmetry is lovely, but where this trend has gone off the rails is when it looks like someone cut the front out of an otherwise long skirt  I know we want to like the Mullet Skirt because it feels a little sexy, a little safe, but when I see so many women who are otherwise hot, being brought down by a Mullet Skirt, an intervention is needed.

Here are my top 6 reasons why you should reconsider before you Mullet yourself:

1. From the back it looks like an ass cape.   When you see a woman walking briskly in a floaty Mullet Skirt, the back trails behind her like a cape.  If she were to run a little faster and put a letter S on her butt, she just might be able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.

2. From the front it looks like a theater curtain.  Presenting….”Legs, The Musical”.  When I see Mullet Skirts, I expect them open and close, with a little leg theater in between, or at least a curtsey.  A good thing if you’re a Rockette.

3. It makes us think we can pull off shorter length skirts than we really can.  It’s tempting to think that if we have something covering our backsides, everything else will be just fine (I know I fall into that trap).  The truth is, the Mullet Skirt frames your legs calling extreme attention to them, especially the part between the knee an upper thigh.   If you’ve got great stems, then go forth and conquer.  But if you’re a little less confident, know that the Mullet highlights the meaty part of the leg, and don’t go shorter than you normally would.

4. It makes your hips look wide and butt looks bigger.  This depends a lot on the cut and how it’s styled, but the flowiness around your hips is what’s adding extra volume, especially if you wear it with ankle boots.

5. It looks like those costumes you find in the adult section of the Halloween store, like “Naughty Devil” or “Sexy Witch”.   I know, I’ve been tempted to buy them too, but when I see Mullets in the day time, part of me is expecting to see a magic wand, wings taped to their back or a witch hat.

6. It confuses men.  We dress for other women, not men, I know.  But when my husband (who never notices ANYTHING) and his friends repeatedly ask if there was a Fairy Con event in session, you know it’s a trend gone wrong.

Ironically, when I explained to the guys it was simply an ass cape, it made complete sense to them.